It’s time I send you a letter that you can save in your pocket. This pocket is for those sayings we laugh at and yet know ring true. This pocket holds generations of anecdotes from women before us, women that have stood alongside us, and even women we have not yet met. This pocket holds hopes and dreams and possibilities of new paths. Your new path.
A woman’s wisdom is a gift that stands the test of time, meant to be treasured. Remember that no matter what. Sometimes the advice isn’t for you, but for the other person struggling. You may be confused at first, but your ah ha moment will come later.
Count to ten. Sometimes it takes me up to twenty, but the counting helps me think about what the heck is bugging me to the point of a slow simmer. I have learned several things since Paul died, and the most important is to let the other person have their say. And then, not respond. Give that other person their freedom to speak. I have found that the healing starts by simply listening. You will feel much better for It.
You are going to feel alone as you adjust to your new town. Get out and get outside. Volunteer. Create a Meet Up. Get a library card. Discover new recipes, maybe create a Pinterest board we can share. Check out all the thrift stores that you will take me to on my first visit. Interview your new primary care physician until you find the right person. Same goes for dentist. Learn yoga, it will be good for your wellbeing; take a few classes to get the hang of it and I’ll send you a few CD’s later. Figure out the best method to ship things to the family; I’m telling you, you will be sending and receiving packages!
Write a list of what you want. What you know you can do to accomplish your goals. Who you want to be going forward, the you that your children and grandchildren to look up to but even more so to come. How you want to communicate to others. How you can mold your new future with love and dreams. Where you see yourself in the future. Where you want to travel on adventure. When you can free yourself of the past. Most importantly, add whimsical items to your list. Make your list realistic and yet fun. I have a list. It’s my barometer for what I envision for myself.
Stake a corner in your new house and make it “yours”. Your place to read, to journal, to discover the world from an open window. For that matter, look out the window often at the beauty of your new surroundings. Get a special blanket for the chair in your corner. Get a good reading lamp, too. Daydream in your place.
Most of all, cherish the love you have found that is remarkable in so many ways. I am so very happy for you. You deserve this man that cherishes you back. Yay Sis!
One more thing, let’s Skype or Face Time often, ok?
Love always, Your Big Sister
#lifelesson #itsasisterthing #sisters #bigsisteradvice