I had a number of topsy turvy’s, one after the other that came my way last week. Mind you, most of these experiences were great: reconnecting with a friend, enriching a friendship with another. Hanging out for an entire morning with a friend and colleague in a real estate offer situation. Spending the afternoon with a past client who has become a sweet friend. Life is truly great.
But one particular episode is the reason for this post. A contractor pushed my boundaries and tried to intimidate me about a job he submitted a bid on. I stood my ground. It was not easy but I just had to do so. It was not about winning or losing, it was about my client. That is my “job”, to represent my Buyers and Sellers. It is the fiduciary duty of a Realtor®
It was how he stated his intention that made me defensive. If you are a woman reading this, you will immediately know what I am referring to. I will admit, I was ruffled that morning. I had a lot on my plate for the day. As of late when things happen to me that I don’t expect, I get a stress headache. Instantly. I have found a solution to when something such as this arises.
I calmly say, I am sorry, but I need to hang up the phone. I don’t want to say something I will regret and I want the same for you.
The last thing I want to do is be hurtful. Buddhism has taught me to listen much better, to let others have their say. If I do not agree, I have found it is better to step back and think about it. After all, we are human. It’s better to think about it than to react. Better listening has been a key in the past two years of my healing process during my grief. Now better listening is the key of my future.
This also falls in to the category of what is taking place in social media during this election cycle. The anonymity of posts, replies and the like based on emotions instead of facts is deplorable. Okay, there, I said it.
I think we are all done with the rhetoric we are being bombarded with, now more than before.
Just hang up. Just hang it up. Go and smell a flower. Take a look at the fall colors. Walk along the river side of the greenbelt. Hike in the foothills on an early morning when the sun rises. Sit outside when the moon is full. Anything that will bring you joy.
It’s so much more important.
#settingboundaries #lifelesson #listenbetter #befree #bekind